Sunday, November 15, 2015

Struggle Station and Self Reflection

Family!!! It's been a crazy week! So disclaimer this email is going to be a little different than usual so just go with it. Being completely honest this week was really hard. There were so many things that happened and i have had to put so much trust in Heavenly Father, but miracles happened as well so i'll talk about that later. 

But this week started out with our solid as investigator, Tama who was set for baptism at the end of the month, moving down to the other side of the north island. it was really hard for Sister Flake and I. These past couple weeks we've had so many good things happen and we were so excited for Tama because he was SO prepared it was unreal. I had to really put aside anything that i wanted and had to put my trust in Heavenly Father and trust that He had a plan for Tama and me being selfish was getting in His way. And because of that little bit of revelation i knew that i had to just trust. That word has been my motto all week. when things come, when doubt creeps in, when people try to tear down my faith; all i say is "trust".

 it's been able to be answers to so many prayers because the past couple of months i guess i've been trying to figure out how i have changed since being on my mission. I made a list of who i was before and who i think i am now. Throughout this whole week i thought about how i would have reacted if something important to me happened and how i would react to it versus now and i can see that i have changed. Before my mission i was very selfish. i really only cared what mattered to me and how I can be happy and not about how it affects others. But with all that has happened i have come to see that i have been able to put SO MUCH more trust in my Father in heaven and i have been able to completely pull myself out of a situation and still be so happy. I don't care about how i look to others, what others think of me; but what OTHERS need and what OTHERS can do to come closer to their Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ. I'm really figuring out what it means when Christ said, "those who shall lose their life for my sake shall find it". like i said it's been a crazy week!

I'm just glad i'm here. i love this gospel and i love being so close to the spirit and changing to become who Heavenly Father wants me to be. I'm still learning and still changing but that's what life is for. I'm sorry for being selfish and caring about myself but i know that being here is so good for me. and it'll be good for us and for my future family one day. 

Sorry for no pictures but i love you all SOOOOO FLIPPIN much! 
Stay awesome
May the Force be with you
Kia Kaha
Sister Judd